Leggings are Totally Pants

A friend told me about this website about my alma mater a few weeks ago and it stuck with me: uiucnopants.com. They have even spurred on a new sister website at Virginia Tech: vtnopants.com.

So for over a year now, I have been pregnant and/or trying to lose the baby weight and leggings have been a complete lifesaver. When my belly exploded to gargantuan proportions during my pregnancy and when I still looked 6 mos pregnant post-baby, leggings came to my rescue. So this attack on fans of leggings and propagating the falsehood that leggings are not pants has hit a nerve with me. I need to live in a world where leggings count as pants! I need to know that I have not been running around pantsless for the past year+!

Let’s use my very expensive and very worthless law degree to resolve this perplexing issue with IRAC: spot the Issue, state the Rule, and Analyze the facts to come to a Conclusion. Let’s just ignore the fact that I have already come to the desired conclusion.

I: Whether or not leggings are totally pants.

R: Merriam-Webster defines pants as “an outer garment covering each leg separately from waist to ankle”.

A: Leggings are an outer garment which indeed cover each leg separately from waist to ankle. For the argumentative type (aka other lawyers out there), whether leggings constitute an outer garment (as opposed to an undergarment!), requires that they be an article of clothing worn on the outside and are not to be worn under another garment (again, see MW). So it is, then, a matter of intent, whether the person meant for the leggings to be worn under another garment or not. As it is unlikely that each person depicted on uiucnopants.com meant to put another garment over their leggings but forgot to, they did not so intend. And so without that intent, the leggings must be outer garments, not undergarments. Aha!

C: Leggings are totally pants, duh.
And I guess if you intend to wear underwear on the outside of your clothes, then that somehow makes them outerwear. Lol.

Let’s see some real world application of this totally fascinating analysis.

Some say a girl with no pants but I say a girl who's not afraid of color!

No pants? No excuses! Leggings are totally pants!

Are those leggings pants? Why are you looking at her pants?! Her boots are totally awesome!

In the future, let’s not victimize fans of leggings. Instead, please realize that you’ve been lawyered! Leggings are totally pants!

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About sourwoman

I'm just like you, I'm just more sour.
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One Response to Leggings are Totally Pants

  1. susie says:

    update! need more stories! you’re like the korean aesop.

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